Monday, March 23, 2009

He is The One.

Man 3/23/09

In a subway car filled with metro-sexuals this morning, there was one that stood head and shoulders above the rest. I daresay that he probably refers to himself in the third person or tells everyone to call him by his nickname: Neo, because clearly he is The One.

Why is this man, The One?

Because he carries a woman’s handbag. Yes, a woman’s handbag. Without shame. Without irony. No tongue-in-cheek. No Sarah Palin plebian-flirt wink. A real woman’s handbag. Not a man-bag. Not a murse. A real woman’s handbag.

The bag itself isn’t very feminine nor is it even very fashionable. It’s reminiscent of something vintage, though clearly still a bag for women. It was a brown pebbled leather. Not chocolate or dark brown, but almost a faded grey-brown. It was about medium-sized and had to basic leather handles and minimal stainless steel hardware - hand-carrying only, no shoulder straps. The bag had white contrast stitching around the edges, and the zipper on the top was pulled shut.

The rest of him was to be expected from a metro-sexual. His winter coat was black wool, but came with a interesting detail. The lapels and the cuffs were trimmed with a tartan fabric. And the entire coat had edges that were frayed. From the lapels to the bottom of the coat, frayed edges and loose threads. All together a great touch of a basic black coat. I wonder if it was self-altered or if a designer actually thought if it –kudos to the designer regardless.

The coat was buttoned up the entire time, but you could see the dark blue skinny tie over his dark maroon shirt. You could also just make out the collar of a cotton zip sweater – it was navy blue. And the jeans were the basic dark indigo slim-fit denim. Curiously given the rest of his deconstructionist flair, the jeans seemed to be well kept.

The shoes really cemented his membership into the metro-sexual club. They were very worn and weathered black leather loafers. Not your typical loafers but rather a more European version with a high cut. The tongue was the design focal point and he deliberately tucked his jeans behind them to show off those shoes better. The tips and sides of the shoes were extremely worn and from afar looked like brown patches on black.

His Bose in-ear earphones linked to a player in his left breast pocket. And the rest of him was free of jewelry or any other accessories.

His hair was short and super curly. And he was also sporting a full beard that was groomed just so. The bushy eyebrows just really added to what seemed to be a man who had a lot of hair.

So. What have we learned?

Wow. A man carrying a woman’s handbag without shame. I don’t know if I am quite ready for this revolution.

I think I’ll sit this one out, Neo. You and Morpheous can go kick ass with Trinity and Niobe. I’m just gonna hang here with The Oracle.

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